Untangling our Reactions with Love and Curiosity

curious anthropologist

If you have a big heart that cares deeply about what you do, and the work you’re doing in the world, then at some point along the way you are going to get triggered.

You can be cruising along, feeling fine, and seemingly out of nowhere – BAM! – something happens that makes you stop dead in your tracks and question who you are and everything you’re doing.

*Note the ‘something’ is most likely an interaction with someone you care about. A friend, partner, mentor, client, etc.

When we get triggered by someone, it’s usually because our ego is getting checked and feels a little bruised; which comes out as finger-pointing judgemental, mad or virtuously self-righteous.

You may momentarily forget you have any ounce of value or worth, because how could you if you’ve found yourself here? Your foundation feels shaken, leaving you feeling a little woozy and raw. It’s super vulnerable(!), so you may feel ashamed or embarrassed, really scared, lost, or mired in a fog of self-doubt.

And guess what?

THIS IS NORMAL.
You’re a human.
You’re learning.

And the best news? You’re not a sociopath. Woohoo!

Seriously, even the most esteemed leaders out there have experienced these complex feelings on their path of greatness. Many, many times.

In fact, if you don’t find yourself up against this learning edge at least a couple times a year, you’re not really growing.

It can be hard to face these feelings and untangle them to find the truth, because it means looking at what you don’t want to see within yourself.

It’s what a mentor of mine calls Productive Humiliation.

Humbling indeed! All of your frameworks and personas, that have been held together with stories from our past – complete with the actions we believe we need to do in order to be liked, loved, accepted or perceived as great – crack and threaten to crumble.

I can vouch for the Productive nature of this humbling experience, too, as I have experienced this a few times this year. It’s not been an easy one to untangle, but I’ve stayed with it, and WOW the lessons within it have been SO powerful!

This week I feel like I finally untangled the last big hairy knot, and as a result am feeling lighter, freer and clearer on it than ever before. Huzzaaaah!

Humbled to tears, grateful beyond words.

We’re all a work in progress. I am a coach to my clients, but I also do a lot of self-coaching on myself; utilizing the tools I’ve learned from all the amazing mentors I’ve had the honor of working with and learning from over the years.

I am so grateful to have the self-awareness and self-compassion required to be in partnership with myself, while navigating the dark and mysterious hallways of my shadow.

In fact, I was sharing this week’s big breakthrough with one of my best girlfriends yesterday and she remarked, in awe, how I can be wading through really hard stuff, and am still so full of joy.

You know why?

Because doing transformational work SETS YOU FREE.

Truly, most of my client session are filled with laughter. For when we finally peel back the layers and see the simple and beautiful truth of our essence, it’s often quite hilarious how hard we’ve been holding on to our painful, limiting perceptions.

“Be a curious anthropologist about the feelings & reactions you have to the people who cross your path. There are treasures buried in there.”

If you’re seeking guidance in untangling something tough, or sense that your fears and reactions may be you getting in your own way of success, joy and peace in your life and business, let’s talk.

Emotional support is my superpower, and I would love to support you in feeling truly alive & free!

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